


Reflected In Your Eyes

by Sseunie



Category: GOT7, igot7
Genre: 2Jae, Bully, Fandom, Friendship, GOT7 - Freeform, Group, Idiots in Love, Idols, JYP - Freeform, Jealousy, Korean, Love, Love/Hate, M/M, Multi, One Shot, Ship, Tom & Jerry, iGot7 - Freeform, jark, jingyeom - Freeform, kpop, markson, singer - Freeform, tease
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2018-11-23 05:07:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11395944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sseunie/pseuds/Sseunie
Summary: Just a series of Markson one shots and perhaps other shipping stories ~Some stories will be simple while others will contain more serious and a little yellow ratedBe prepared for some Jackson/Mark obsessiveness, cuteness, jealousy and sorrow!





	1. Late Night Confession & Low-key Jealousy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don't mess with a jealous Jackson, he's dangerous, dangerously hot  
> Mark's being a cutie, a mean cutie

It was another day of shooting “I GOT7”, this time it was the last episode.

We were playing a game which was about turning the table around so it was allowed to be disrespectful at a hyung.

When it was my turn, I wanted to make the audience laugh so I mentioned the time where Jaebum fell asleep even though he had been the one to tell us not to fall asleep. When I said that, the other laughingly agreed and Jinyoung even made a demonstration.

It was all going fine and it was funny. But neither of us had expected what Mark would say when it was his turn.

“Jinyoung-ie… I love you,” he suddenly said, making all of us surprised.

It would be a lie if I said that I was only surprised. The feelings of jealousy over-boiled when Jinyoung got up to give Mark a tight hug and Mark didn’t even refuse it.

I was trying my best at keeping my cool and all I could say was “What are you doing?”

When we were wrapping up and finishing the shooting, Mark caught my eye and tried to send me a smile. I looked away, not wanting to forgive him just yet. Unless he had a damn good reason as to why he had confessed to another guy in front of his boyfriend.

I wasn’t going to let this slide so easily.

I avoided the car that Mark had chosen on purpose and went in the other.

Knowing full well how petty and childish I was, I still couldn’t let go of my jealousy.

These days it seemed like Mark and Jinyoung was getting closer because I mostly wasn’t there due to shootings in China. The overseas shootings were fun but I always missed Mark too much to actually enjoy what I was doing. Yesterday when I got back from shooting “Go Fridge”, I found Mark and Jinyoung sleeping on the sofa, Mark’s hand resting on Jinyoung’s thigh. And now he was openly confessing and hugging Jinyoung right in front of me.

I shook my head and closed my eyes, trying hard for an hour or so to catch up on the sleep I had missed on the flight back to Korea yesterday. But my mind was bullying me by replaying the same scene over and over again.

Giving a loud sigh I pulled out my headphones, turned up the volume and faced the window. Jaebum must have noticed my mood because he slightly bumped his shoulder against mine.

“What’s wrong?”

I gave him a look, telling him with my eyes that I didn’t even want to talk about it because it only made me upset. He just nodded understandingly and went back to reading the Korean version of “How To Kill A Mockingbird”.

When we were finally back at the dorm, Mark immediately came to my side.

“Hey, is something wrong?”

I looked at him, obviously shook by the fact that he had no clue whatsoever. The others went to their respective rooms, yawning and stretching, only giving each other a short “Goodnight”.

I pulled Mark with me all the way to our room and when I had closed the door, I faced him, arms crossed.

“Are you for real, Mark?” I said in disbelief. “You’re asking me what’s wrong? How about you rewind back to today’s shooting,” I hinted, my voice slightly complaining and angry. 

I wasn’t going to tell him, he had to figure it out by himself.

It took him longer than I wanted and when he remembered, he went like “Aaah, that? That was nothing.”

Now I was mad.

I grabbed him by the arm and pushed him on the bed. Knowing he was going to escape, my reflexes worked faster and in a second I was on top of him, holding his hands above his head.

“Tuan Yi En, don’t make me mad,” I said in a low voice and nipped at his lips.

“I’m not. Get off me, Jac-“

Biting a specific sensitive spot on his collarbone, I cut off his voice and made him let out a moan instead.

I wanted him, right here and right now.

It was long time since I’d had some and even though it was the same for him, I knew by knowledge that he was more patient and lasting than me. He could go a month without. As for me, I only lasted a week, maybe less.

I was still holding his hands captive while I let my other hand wander down his firm chest and stomach until I reached the rough part of his jeans. Giving a slight pressure on his crotch, I was satisfied by the gasp I heard and felt on my face.

“GaGa,” he whispered, panting and trembling under me.

I moved my face closer to him, bullying him by letting him think I was going to kiss him but pulling away again. The disappointment I saw in his eyes made me waver for a moment.

I wanted him too, way more than him. But I was still sulky and I wanted an explanation.

“‘I love you, Jinyoung’, huh?” I said, bowing one last time to bite his ear lobe before I pulled away and stood up.

“I’m not gonna forgive you so easily, Mark.”

He got up on one elbow and tilted his head a bit. “It’s not like that, Jackson. You know Jinyoung’s only a friend,” he tried to argue but I wasn’t going to just buy it like that.

“Friend? So you sleep with friends while watching a movie? You only do that with your lover, Mark.”

He sighed and scratched the back of his head, getting a little frustrated.

“I was waiting up for you and Jinyoung offered to keep me company. It was nothing serious. Don’t exaggerate so much, Wang Jia Er.”

“Don’t tell me not to exaggerate, it’s what everyone would think if they saw your position. I mean who allowed you to touch another man beside me?”

My hand gestures were getting out of hand and apparently I made Mark laugh.

“You are so testing me right now, Yi En,” I said and was going to leave when he opened his mouth.

“Your jealous ass thinks I haven’t seen you with Jaebum?”

I turned around. He was sitting on his knees on the bed, the laugh was gone from his face and instead he was looking at me, dead serious.

“You and Jaebum are also getting closer, Jackson, I’m not blind and I also get jealous. Lately there are a lot of “Jackbum” posts of you two. But I know that it’s not serious stuff. That’s why I don’t bring it up.”

I knew that Mark was more mature and understanding. He never really did say anything when Jaebum and I got a bit intimate. He just accepted it and moved on. Which didn’t necessarily mean that I liked it that way.

“No, but can’t you get jealous sometimes? I feel like it’s always me who gets jealous or mad. Why can’t you also want me?” I complained.

He looked at me for a couple of seconds. Then he answered.

“I don’t know.. I feel like if I do that, I’ll come out as annoying and clingy and I don’t want to be that way.”

I went to the bed and reached out for him.

“What are you saying? You can never be annoying and I like clingy.”

He took my hand and surprised me by pulling me in. I fell on the bed and I definitely wasn’t prepared when I suddenly saw his beautiful face right in front of me.

“I’m sorry for today,” he said in a soft tone. “And I’m sorry if I touched Jinyoung where I shouldn’t have when I was sleeping.”

Finally a smile broke out of my lips and I let my hands snake around his neck as I pulled him closer.

“It’s okay. It’s just that for a moment, I thought you two had done something while I was away.”

He laughed, showing a handsome row of white teeth.

“Silly,” he only said but that one word warmed my heart.

I gave him a smile as I wrapped my legs around his waist and tightened the grip.

We couldn’t get closer than we already were yet I wanted to feel every single centimeter of his body on mine.

“Don’t look at other guys except me, only me,” I whispered in his ear and went down to his neck, pressing a kiss on it.

He gave a soft laughter and said “You’re awfully jealous and posessive, Jackson.”

I rolled with him in my arms so I could once again be on top, this time with a different feeling than before. The hunger must have shown in my eyes because he hesitated a bit.

“Why? I can’t?” I asked and gently kissed him on the lips.

“Don’t we have an early schedule tomorrow?” he said and stretched his neck to plant a kiss on my jaw line.

I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t know, do we?”

We both knew that we did indeed have to wake up early. But neither of us really wanted to admit it because it would mean that we had to pause all this. And we weren’t ready to give up this make-out for our early activities.

“I want you, Tuan Yi En, please don’t say no,” I said.

“Yeah ... I know, but let’s not overdo it,” Mark said.

I sent him a crooked smile as I bowed down to kiss him.

Our lips moved in sync. My hands were exploring his perfect and soft body while his hands were in my hair and around my neck, gently caressing my skin.

One piece of clothing after another fell to the ground.

That night we only got three hours of sleep. 

We had underestimated ourselves. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda serious/not serious chapter, I guess.  
> Tell me how you liked it ;)  
> Leave a comment and give me some self-confidence to do more of these one-shots :))


	2. Eyes On You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaebum is obsessed with his sunshine, Youngjae ~  
> Read how precious they treat each other :')

“Why didn’t you clap?”

Jackson pointed accusingly at Youngjae after hitting a strike with his bowling ball. He looked dramatically at him the way only Jackson could.

Mark and BamBam laughed at him and Jinyoung fell on the couch, bursting out with laughter while covering his mouth.

“No, but why should I clap? You aren’t even in my team,” Youngjae tried to argue, holding back a grin.

“I cheered for you just now!” Jackson raised his eyebrows, looking dead serious at Youngjae. “You scored three points but I still cheered for you,” added Jackson, a high-pitched laughter filled the room.

I was watching the whole scene, holding one person in my focus.

Youngjae’s eyes searched till they hit mine, a smile lighted up his face. I returned his smile and gave him a wink I hoped was not too obvious. The smile on his lips widened and I felt my heart become warm.

This was the feeling he got out of me on daily basis. Just him breathing was enough to make my heart go crazy.

Yugyeom clicked his fingers in front of me, making me return to reality. He sent me a crooked smile and I felt it on a disrespectful level so I immediately got up.

“Yugyeom, come here,” I said, my voice low-key threatening him. He grinned and tried to escape but I caught up to him and reached out for him.

Grabbing him by his neck, I made him sit down on the couch beside me.

Yugyeom suddenly leaned in and gestured that he wanted to whisper something in my ear so I gave him my attention.

“Hyung, you were staring too obviously at Youngjae.”

Feeling my ears turn red, I pulled away, couldn’t look at Yugyeom for a solid 10 seconds.

I caught Jinyoung’s eye and made my counter-attack.

“And Jinyoung is staring at you way too obviously, be careful, he might not look like it but he’s actually the jealous type,” I whispered back, satisfied with my comeback line.

Yugyeom looked up only to duck his head at the look Jinyoung gave him.

It was Youngjae’s turn to throw the ball. I noticed how Mark and Jackson were standing in the corner, away from us others.

I stood up and went to Youngjae. He was holding the ball in a wrong way, his elbow was turned to the right side.

“You do it like this,” I said and gently adjusted his arm.

“Jaebum,” he said, without honorifics and only turned his head a bit, being way too focused on angling the ball in his hand.

“Shh,” I said in a low tone. “The others might hear.”

When we were alone, we always dropped every formality we usually had when we were with others. We would find a comfort level and that was always one of my favorite times. Being intimate with Youngjae.

“Sorry, it slipped out of my mouth,” he said and tried to follow my adjustments.

I gave his shoulders a gently squeeze, hinting that now was the time to throw the ball.

Almost getting a strike, Youngjae filled the bowling hall with his powerful voice and jumped up from excitement. I could only watch his reaction, my heart melting at the sight.

The rest of the afternoon we were mostly chilling on the couch, chatting back and forth, none of us really wanted to break the relaxed mood.

Jinyoung was teasing Yugyeom, BamBam was talking selfies with a new Snapchat filter and Mark was almost falling asleep, his head resting on Jackson’s shoulder.

Youngjae was sitting beside me, his thigh touching mine and his shoulder pressed back because of me.

“Are you sitting comfortably?” I asked him, concerned because he looked so squeezed.

He gave a short laugh and nodded. “I’m fine.”

“Is your back ache better?”

Another nod.

“What about your feet? You said these bowling shoes are too small.”

He smiled. “You are worrying too much, hyung. I’m really fine.”

Noticing that he hadn’t touched the sandwich nor the drinks, I looked at him, again worried.

“Why haven’t you eaten anything? How are you going to take care of yourself if you don’t eat properly?”

Youngjae gave a low sigh at my constant nagging but the smile hadn’t disappeared. “I ate earlier so I’m full now.”

I grabbed his hand from under the table. “Really?”

“Yeah, really,” he reassured me. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” he said and stood up.

After he had left, I sat down, debating whether I should follow or not. My feelings won over my logic and I got up. On my way out, I saw Yugyeom intertwining fingers with Jinyoung. No matter how Jinyoung and Yugyeom were on-camera, they could be so adorable off-camera.

In the bathroom Youngjae was washing his hands, thoroughly, scrubbing every finger and getting rid of non-existing dirt between his fingers.

I leaned my shoulder on the doorframe and couldn’t help but smile.

“Jae,” I called out when he didn’t look up.

Meeting my eyes he looked a bit surprised, only a bit.

He repeated our signature name, “Jae,” a beautiful smile breaking out on his lips. He looked like the angel he was.

I spread my arms and welcomed him in an embrace.

He accepted my request and laughed an adorable laugh as he said “You are hungry for my attention today, what’s going on?”

I rested my chin on his head and sniffed in his heavenly scent.

“I’m always hungry for you, I just don’t always show it.”

He lightly kissed my Adam’s apple before slightly pulling away so he could look me in the eyes.

“How’s your throat? It’s been hurting these days, right?”

His eyes were filled with concern.

I sent him a warm smile. “It’s better, thanks to the homemade honey your mother gave me.”

He wrapped his arms around my waist. “That’s great, I’m gonna thank my mom later.”

I chuckled.

We stood there for a few more moments, enjoying the closeness of each other.

“Let’s go back, the others might wonder where we disappeared to,” he said and was about to step away.

I quickly grabbed his arm. “Give me a kiss before we leave,” I said, leaning in to him.

He pushed me laughingly away. “What? No, I’m not going to.”

“Just one,” I begged, trying to make a pouting face which only made him laugh louder.

“You are so cute when you try to do aegyo,” he said and gently pinched my cheek.

“Cute?” I said, a bit shocked. But I went right back to trying to get a kiss from him.

“If you give me a kiss right here, I’ll buy you whatever you need for Coco,” I said in a last try.

His eyes suddenly shined. “Really?”

I nodded, getting jealous at the fact that the mention of Coco could get that kind of reaction out of him.

He suddenly leaned in and planted a light kiss on my lips, taking me by surprise.

My mind didn’t even have time to register what happened before he had pulled away. In a splitsecond he was gone, having run away.

I stood for a few more seconds, trying to get myself together. I was still not really over what had happened when I came back to our bowing area.

Youngjae’s cheeks blushed a bit when he saw me. I smiled. A blushed Youngjae was my favorite Youngjae.

I was trying to get him to meet my eyes when Mark loudly said “Yah!” All eyes turned on them and BamBam asked what happened.

 

 

**Bonus Markson chapter**

Jackson was sitting way too close to me, forget our thighs, our whole bodies were touching. And unlucky for me, I was sitting at the edge so I couldn’t even move away.

My feelings were one big mess and my body was heating up.

I gave a few warning looks at Jackson but he had a poker face on while pretending he was listening to BamBam.

I suddenly felt Jackson’s hand find its way under my hoodie. Out of shock and surprise I could only sit still while he snaked his hand around my stomach.

“Jackson, stop..” I whispered and silently hoped no one would notice how my voice was becoming more and more panting. And I was damn hoping that Yugyeom wouldn’t look to his side and bust us. He was already sharp enough.

“Stop what?” Jackson asked, his voice relaxed and a little smile hidden in the left corner of his lips.

I rolled my eyes but I didn’t get far. His hand went from my navel down to the fringe of my underwear. That’s when I reacted.

“Yah!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this time I did a 2Jae fanfic ~  
> I don't know about this one, though. I mean it's cute but..what about it, guys? Tell me in the comments and encourage me to continue :))
> 
> Note: Have you noticed how Youngjae doesn't have his hitting habit with Jaebum?
> 
> Short quiz: Does GOT7 know of each others' relationships? And if yes, which members? ^^


	3. Push and Pull

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We love Tom & Jerry in love, don't we ~?
> 
> Enjoy Jingyeom bullying each other lovingly :')

Jaebum stuffed his mouth with half a sandwich, making Youngjae and BamBam look amazed at him at how all of that could fit. Jackson was dancing to Big Bang’s “Bang Bang Bang” and Mark was standing a few steps away, laughing at him.

I took off my glasses and rubbed my nose and eyes.

“Why do you wear glasses when you have contact lenses?”

Yugyeom’s head popped up in front of me, his earring dangled as he tilted his head a bit.

“Contact lenses are such a bother,” I answered and put the black color framed glasses back on.

“You look cute when you wear them,” Yugyeom said, smiling from one cheek to another.

I hit him lightly. “Yah, don’t say it like that, Mark hyung might hear.”

He rolled his eyes. “Mark hyung only has eyes for Jackson hyung.”

“What are you guys talking about?” Jackson joined our conversation so suddenly that Yugyeom jolted a bit. I hid my laugh in a cough and explained to a nosy Jackson who had an assistent trying to fix his bangs despite his moving around.

“Yugyeom thinks you care about Mark more than the other members,” I said, changing Yugyeom’s original comment. Yugyeom was about to correct me but Jackson was quicker.

“Whyyy? I don’t. All the members are important to me, why would you think that?” He turned his gaze at a panicking Yugyeom and I silently made my escape route while the two got caught up in a heated discussion.

Later in the dressing room Yugyeom came to me.

“Hyuung,” his voice complaining, “Do you know how hard it was for me to convince Jackson?”

I tried to suppress my laughter but the expression on his face was too funny.

He only stood there looking at me, a pouting expression showing on his lips.

His hands reached out for my waist. “Always such a bully,” he said but there was something about his voice, something that sounded anything but complaining. Maybe it was because he had lowered his tone as if he was about to do something illegal.

Taking a step back, I looked warning at him. “Not here, Gyeomie.”

A smile broke out on his lips. “I like it when you call me that.”

I rolled my eyes at him but in the meantime he had managed to snake his arms around my torso and suddenly I was in his embrace.

He really was tall. Almost a head taller than me.

The others were too busy goofing around. Jackson and Mark were nowhere to be seen. BamBam was showing Youngjae and Jaebum something on his phone. Everyone’s attention were diverted elsewhere.

I raised my head to meet Yugyeom’s soft eyes.

He sent me an adorable smile and his hands resting on my back were tightly intertwined as if he refused to let go of me.

Taking his face in my hands, I shook it gently. “You are so big, why are you still growing?”

He laughed but I couldn’t help noticing how his face was getting closer to mine and his fingers caressing my skin.

“I missed you,” he said and put his head on my shoulder.

A smile crept up on my face. “Why? We haven’t been apart for that long.”

Sighing once, he embraced me properly. “My mom always talks about you and that makes me miss you.”

I pressed a kiss on his nape and pulled away. “Then come back to the dorm. It’s not like you can’t.”

“But there’s no room anymore. Plus I’m always walking in on our not-so-subtle couple,” he said, referring to Jackson and Mark.

He was right, though. Sometimes, those two couldn’t keep their hands away from each other, especially when Jackson came back from a schedule abroad. That idiot would grope Mark all kinds of places and make us others roll our eyes at them, throwing comments like “They are at it again.”

Mark who didn’t like to be intimate in front of others usually didn’t have much of a choice since Jackson was a manipulating brat who liked to get his way. Though he had a soft spot for Mark if he refused or complained to Jackson. And boy oh boy, if anyone teased Mark while Jackson was near… then he’d make hell break loose on those who would dare bully his ‘Markiepooh’.

At least Jaebum and Youngjae were better at keeping their personal stuff to themselves.

But Yugyeom was the kind of person to consider others before he even thought of himself. That was one of the traits about him that I loved. The ever so kind Yugyeom.

Voicing my thoughts I said “Sometimes you have to think about yourself first. You always consider others before yourself.”

He shrug on his shoulders. “It’s fine, I don’t really mind.”

Pinching his skinny face I gave him a hopeless look. “Then don’t complain that you missed me.”

I was about to leave but he grabbed my wrist with such a strength that I felt my back bump into the wall.

“Yah,” I said and was about to scold him when I suddenly noticed how he was eliminating the distance between us.

I raised my head only to see the beautiful birth mark under his right eye.

“Why don’t you stay over at my place tonight? My mom’s gonna visit our relative in Gyeonggi so we’re gonna be alone,” he said with a dangerous voice.

The moment I felt his breath on my forehead a rush of warning bells in my mind sounded.

“Kim Yugyeom, back off or..” I started but I didn’t get far before he leaned in to nip at my ear.

Slightly shivering, I finally managed to push him away.

“Such a tease,” I said, shaking my head at him but he just stood there, looking oddly satisfied and with a little smile on his lips.

That just kinda pissed me off. How he had me right where he wanted me.

“I’m not gonna go anywhere near your house,” I added and went away before he could pull that on me again.

Later my phone vibrated continuously and I only needed to glance at my phone to know. Yugyeom was sending emoticons and messages containing multiple “Please ~”.

I laughed but clicked the phone off and completely ignored his texts.

Served him right.

As someone older than him, it amazed and scared me at the same time how he could get that kind of reaction out of me. My composed self would never admit how my legs had been shaking. It was really easy for him to make me admit defeat when he turned lusty. That was something I knew from experience.

“Jinyoung-ah, Yugyeom is crying,” Jackson said from the seat behind me, his phone in his hand.

I turned my head halfway only to see Mark snuggling up against Jackson, his hands under Jackson’s hoodie.

No matter how much spit they would share in front of us, they really looked adorable at moments like these.

“Let him cry his eyes out. He deserves it,” I replied coldly but a few giggles forced its way out of my mouth.

“Waaah, you’re so mean,” Jackson said, totally amazed.

“I’d never do this to Jackson,” Mark added from the side, his head comfortably resting on Jackson’s shoulder.

Jackson nodded. “Right, no matter how much of an asshole I can be, Mark just forgives me almost right away.”

They sounded like that one couple who were desperate to show people what a perfect relationship they were in even though we all knew that when Jackson got stubborn, Mark would wanna beat his ass so badly. And opposite, when Mark didn’t give Jackson attention, Jackson would go sulky for a day or two.

“Poor Yugyeom.”

“Never knew Jinyoung is a sadist.”

“I know, right?”

They had both switched to English and were in full swing trying to get me annoyed. Which was working.

“Shut up, both of you,” I said.

They laughed when they saw that their plan had succeeded.

When our two cars parked in front of our dorm, I saw how Yugyeom rushed to me.

“Hyung ~” he said as soon as he saw me.

I laughed and ruffled up in his hair, sending him a soft smile. “I was just joking, why do you get worried so easily. You even came all the way to our dorm even though your apartment is on the other side of the town.”

He was obviously sulking but hearing my words he cheered up, giving me a happy puppy look. I was almost expecting his tongue to show too.

“Then does that mean..?” he said, the hopefull eyes looking directly into mine.

Pulling him by his shirt, I nodded. “Yeah, let’s go.”

He gave out a loud happy shout and followed me like a puppy follows its master.

“Oh, Tom & Jerry have made up!” I heard Jackson’s silly voice in the background followed by Youngjae’s particular loud laugh.

As soon as we sat in the car, Yugyeom forgot all about restrictions and personal space as he literally let half his body lie on mine with a comfortable hum.

Thinking back on his “tonight”, I sighed.

God knew I wouldn’t get any sleep tonight..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you thought about this chapter and if I should write more Jingyeom :))
> 
> Kudos and comments are as always welcome ^^


	4. It Used To Be Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Markson is no longer Markson

Jackson walked around the table and placed himself in the front as he faced the fans. I looked over to catch his eyes but he was staring in the air.

Jinyoung bumped his shoulder into Jackson’s to get this attention and said “Sseunah, you okay?”

Jackson looked up and sent him the softest smile I’d seen in a long time, then nodded. 

I turned away.

It kinda hurt. Jackson smiling like that. To someone else.

It used to be us, having that special connection we communicated in. Whether it was Jackson offering me his headphones, him showing me a photo on his phone or just him simply keeping a hand on my back as if he was making sure I knew he was there.

It just always used to be an “us”. Now it had faded away. He hadn’t become cold or anything. More like, he was less goofy with me and definitely less touchy.

Not knowing my feelings at that time, I would simply feel a certain warmth whenever he was with me. And before I knew it, it was too late. He had become busy, he had matured and his attention had wandered from me to someone else. 

I loved him. I really loved him. I didn’t mind the stinging pain in my chest whenever I saw him laughing with someone else. I didn’t mind the sleepless nights where I would wonder if he missed me the same way I missed him.

I just needed him to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very short one-shot I did because I was feeling melancholic, hope you like it :))
> 
> A 2Jae one-shot is following


	5. Always Run To You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2Jae and Markson in one chapter, we love that, don't we :))

“I told you not to hit me, yah! I’ve told you since 2015 to not hit me on the right side where my heart is, I’m warning you, Youngjae-ah.”

Jackson pulled up a finger pointing at Youngjae and the dramatic voice made Jinyoung and Mark laugh.

Youngjae bursted out in a loud laughter which filled the room.

My favorite sound in the world.

A fan suddenly talked to me and my attention turned towards her but got cut off quickly because Youngjae ran to me and hid behind my back.

“Hyung, say something to Jackson, he’s bullying me,” he said while laughing and panting a little.

Jackson shot up big eyes at me. “I didn’t, he started it first.”

Youngjae’s hands were resting on my shoulders, his body pressed against me.

I couldn’t help but feel my whole body reacting. The speed of my heart beat began increasing and I felt my palms sweating.

I shook my head at Jackson but smiled. Youngjae was leaning in on me.

“Your shoulders are so broad, hyung,” he suddenly said, patting my shoulders a few times before he pulled away.

“So soft,” the younger added, a wide smile appearing on his lips.

I watched the beautiful white teeth and his shining eyes. He was so… mesmerizing.

I suddenly realized I was staring too much and quickly covered it with a joke. “Yah, are you saying I’m fat?”

Shaking his head so hard that the long bangs followed with the movements, he laughed again, hurriedly denying it.

 

Right before the fan meeting was coming to an end, I heard a bam.

I turned my head right in time to see Youngjae fall on the ground. The big table had also fallen down.

I almost ran to him and grabbed his hand, feeling a mix between panic and fear.

“Youngjae! You alright?”

He looked up, a bit confused but then gave a little nod. “Ah, I’m fine. But, uh Jackson hyung..”

He pointed to his side and it was only now that I saw how the table was pressing Jackson down on the ground. The edge was digging into his shoulder and his expression was pained.

Jinyoung and Yugyeom quickly lifted the table up and Jackson sat up. Mark had appeared next to Jackson, one hand on his shoulder as he tried to get his attention.

The noise from the fans was deafening but my ears had completely shut off for everything except what was in front of me.

I helped Youngjae up and Jackson shooed away Jinyoung and Mark who both looked very worried.

“I’m fine, it’s nothing,” Jackson kept insisting but we all knew that the table was big and heavy and it must have hurt like hell.

I made Youngjae look at me. “Are you really okay? Nothing happened to you?”

I could see the worried looks he sent Jackson’s way but he gave me a nod and gestured with his hand as he said “No, no, I’m okay, really. Rather than me, Jackson hyung..”

His voice faded away as he turned to look in Jackson’s direction.

But now the rage was getting to me. “Are you crazy? What were you thinking? Why can’t you be more careful? What if Jackson hadn’t been there? The table would’ve crushed you. Geez, I cant believe you.”

The vocalist became quiet. He started bitting his lips and fumbling with his fingers. The things he usually did when he was nervous or insecure.

I stopped rambling, suddenly realizing my mistake. “Sorry.. You just scared me there.”

“No, I’m sorry,” sounded the little voice.

“Hey,” I said and grabbed his hands “I’m really sorry, okay. Just please be more careful.”

He nodded and sent me a little reassuring smile.

Mark walked up to Jackson and touched his arm. “Hey, are you sure you are fine?”

“Of course I am, my body is not as weak as Youngjae’s,” he said, attempting and failing to joke.

“Jackson,” said Jinyoung who suddenly appeared.

The wrinkles between their eyebrows showed that they were worried and they had no intention to believe Jackson when he said he was alright.

“Yah, don’t do that. It’s not that serious, I’ll be okay. Now turn towards your fans, it’s disrespectful to stand with your back on them.”

Jinyoung sighed, Mark shook his head at Jackson.

“He’s never honest,” said Mark and turned away from Jackson.

“I’m going to tell our manager if I see him look even the least uncomfortable,” stated Jinyoung and did the same.

“Hey,” started Jackson but he didn’t get far because both Jinyoung and Mark said “Shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me how you liked this comment and how I can improve ^^


	6. Protected Through Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just some scrabbles of a one-shot that doesn't really get anywhere and also a piece of my thoughts on why Markson is like they are now :))

“You … you’ve changed towards Mark.”

Jinyoung had just come back from gym and that was the first thing he said to me.

I looked up from my phone, a bit surprised by his statement.

Sitting up and straightening my back, I put my phone away from my. “What makes you say that?”

Jinyoung walked around the table to sit next to me, his shirt all sweaty and wet.

“Nothing.. I just noticed.”

“Be honest with me, Jinyoung. What happened?”

He shrug on his shoulders and leaned back. “Mark said some things.”

I lowered my head, couldn’t bear to look him in the eyes.

Of course Mark had said something. He had every right to. I was surprised he’d even went without telling the others for so long until now.

“Did he tell you?”

Jinyoung nodded.

“Everything?”

“Does it matter? Jackson, he’s hurting. He puts on a smile but he’s actually in pain. I hate to see him like that.”

I sighed. “He doesn’t know anything. Neither do you. So don’t speak when you only got one side of the story.”

I stood up but Jinyoung was fast as always. He grabbed my wrist. “So tell me. I’m here for you, since when did you keep things from me too?”

I felt like telling Jinyoung to never speak of this matter again and walk my way. But I also knew that it wouldn’t solve anything.

Instead I let myself fall down on the couch again.

“You don’t know this, Jinyoung. But I’ve always had feelings for Mark. And I knew he had for me too. One year ago he confessed. I wanted to say yes. My heart yearned for him. But then I got sick. My daily schedule grew so busy, there would be times when I couldn’t see him for a week. I remember that time when I collapsed at the fan meeting. Or when I was in that car accident. He was terrified. Everyday he was worried about me. He couldn’t sleep or concentrate properly.”

Jinyoung had reached over and taken my hand in his. He must have known that saying all this was hurting me.

I turned my head and looked Jinyoung in the eyes.

“I can’t do this to him. I’m not going to. Dating me means problems and endless worry. I’m poisonous. I realized that if I truly love him, I’ll let go of him. I have no actual right to torture him like this. If he starts getting expectations of me …”

After listening to me, Jinyoung finally spoke up. “But what if Mark doesn’t think this way? Why don’t you listen to him first?”

I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter what Mark thinks. My burden will be my burden only. If I can minimize his troubles, I will. Even if it means we will never get to be together.”

“Jackson..”

I pulled my hand out of his. “Don’t. I love Mark. He means everything to me. But I will never hurt him like that. Jaebum and Youngjae are happy because they are with each other all the time. I’m in China so often, what right do I have to tell Mark to wait for me every time I leave? It’s unfair, but hey, life is unfair.”

I heard Jinyoung’s loud sigh. “I don’t know what to say to you. You just keep doing things your way and you refuse to see it through others’ perspective.”

“I know what I’m doing. Don’t argue with me, Jinyoung.”

I left the room, leaving Jinyoung with his sighs alone.

This probably sounded stupid but I was just protecting Mark from all the bad things that came with dating me. Maybe in the future, if things calmed down and he still had feelings for me …

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda wanted to continue this but then it'd be too long and I'd never actually get to finish it so it remains a one-shot ^^  
> Hope you liked it :P  
> Kudos and comments are as always welcome


	7. Can't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What a heartbreaker. Breaking the heart of the one he holds most dear.

“Jackson.”

“I said stop. I’m not in the mood, Jinyoung, let it be.”

“Jackson!”

“STOP!”

I snapped. My eyes were furious, fists clenched into two rocks. Lips pressed together and making a sharp line.

“He needs to at least know the truth.”

Jinyoung was really persistent. That and annoying.

“What he needs is to clearly be told where the line goes. I’ll be the one to tell him. Don’t interfere.”

I kept the eye connection a second more before I turned around. Almost having left the room, I heard him yell after me “He deserves to know about your feelings.”

“Shut up,” I mumbled to myself.

I entered the room which belonged to me and Mark. He was on his phone, lying stretched on the bed. Relaxed, calm and in a good mood. I hated that I had to put an end to it.

“Mark, get up, we need to talk.”

I was standing tall over him. I doubt he even noticed the frown on my face.

“Jia Er, what is it? Why are you so serious?”

Why did he have to call me by my Chinese name? That name which had started those annoying butterflies in my stomach long ago when we’d met each other for the first time. The stupid Chinese name that had made me break a taboo. That name was an uncalled rule between us, a promise of something we could never have.

He gave a short laughter and showed off the pretty sharp teeth. My favorite sight in the world.

I shook myself off any kind of fluttering feelings, my next words wouldn’t be so fluttery.

“You like me, don’t you?”

I was cruel, cutting right to the point and doing more than surprising him.

He looked back at me, eyes and mouth open in the same way. He then averted his eyes to somewhere between the desk and the door, unable to meet my eyes.

“You.. what are you talking about?”

I sighed, just wanted to get this over with as soon as possible.

“I know. I heard you and Jaebum.”

His head flung up, eyes begging me to not dig into this further, pretend I hadn’t heard anything.

Impossible. Not when I was about to reject him in the most brutal way.

“It was, err.. Jackson, we were just, because that time I couldn’t-“

I put a hand up and stopped him from his uncertain flow of words. “I can’t do this, Mark. I like you and all. But only as a friend. We can’t ever be a thing. I can give you a list of reasons why. But the one that tops it is simply my feelings. Can’t we just remain friends? Please don’t ruin our friendship. It means too much for me.”

He laughed, awkwardly. A series of feelings flashed in his ever so beautiful eyes. I could tell just by one look how uneasy, uncomfortable and hurt he felt at this moment.

And something happened in my chest. The feeling of something burning, a thousand knives stabbing my heart again and again.

Because the next moment tears started falling from his eyes.

He laughed again, without humor as he tried to wipe the continuously falling tears from his eyes.

“Ah, really. That’s what I thought too.. I just .. didn’t expect you to find out so soon.”

He shrug his shoulders and turned away.

My hand reached out for him but stopped midway.

Shit, I didn’t have any right to touch him right now. This was so painful, I felt like dying.

“It’s okay. I’m okay. Don’t worry.”

Was it? Was he? How could I not worry? I had practically crushed his heart.

“Ah, it’s so hot in here. I’ll go take a quick shower.”

His head turned the other way and his hand hiding his face, he brushed past me as he tried to muffle the sounds of painful cries in his sleeve.

The door to the bathroom clicked. And I felt the whole world come crashing down on me.

My knees hit the ground. And I finally let it all out. The tears came out mixed with snot and saliva.

Damn it. This was a living hell.

A warm hand pressed on my back. I didn’t move when Jinyoung wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me in a gentle embrace.

“You idiot. You’re hurting both of you.”

I sniffed in his chest.

He let his hands run up and down my back, warming me up.

His soothing voice was right beneath my ear. “You’ll be alright. Just let some time pass. Soon it’ll just feel like a bad dream.”

I tried pushing him away but he was as persistent as ever.

“What are you doing here with me? I’m not the one who needs it the most at this time,” I managed to say without hiccuping.

I heard the little smile behind his voice as he answered. “Stupid, the one who causes pain is usually the one who’s hurting the most.”

My eyes fell on the bathroom door and the sound of the shower turned on. Then I looked up at the gentle and comforting eyes of my best friend. 

“Take care of him, Jinyoung. I won’t be in Korea for more than a month. Don’t let him be alone too much. And make sure he eats, take him out for dinner or something. Just stay by his side. Okay?”

He blinked with his eyes, silently making a promise with me.

I got up and looked at him.

“Find some clothes for him, something warm, long sleeve and oversize. Sweatpants.”

Before I turned around, Jinyoung chuckled. “You really know him best.”

I did. Of course I did. Something I was ashamed of today because I also knew exactly where to strike to hurt. Would I ever get over the feeling of self-hate?

With my hand on the door handle, I stopped for a moment to say;

“Don’t ever tell him that I love him. Ever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I'm feeling in such an angst mood these times.. Hope you all liked the little one-shot I made, though ~   
> Tell me in the comments if you want me to make it into a series :))  
> Any ideas for plots I should write next time? ^^


	8. Sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A story inspired from these days where our precious Wang Stubborn aka Wang Workaholic isn't feeling on top. I pray for him every night before I go to sleep so seeing him so sick made me worried sick. Seeing the fancams of him after his performance at the Open Fire Concert (180113) didn't help because he couldn't walk straight.  
> Thank god he's a little better.  
> Anyway, enjoy :))  
> It's kinda an continuation from previous story ^^

I bowed down as I sang in the mic. My body was drenched in sweat, the pain in my back sharp as knife and I could barely breathe.

I gave it my all. Sang my lungs dry of voice and danced the choreography I had rehearsed so many times since yesterday.

It was hard, it hurt. But it’d be a lie if I said I didn’t enjoy it. My fans were cheering so enthusiastically and energetically for me on the rows not far away. I couldn’t disappoint them.

The big Wang signs were visual and bright, so beautiful, I thought.

As I sang the last few sentences, the cheers got louder.

My heart was beating rapidly in my chest and my legs threatened to let go of my body weight.

The light got turned off and the staff led me down the stage. Every step of the staircase down felt like a thousand knives on my back. I was dizzy and it blacked out in front of my eyes a few times.

Fearing that I might collapse, I hurried away through the crowd of fans reaching for me. Eye contact was impossible. I was trembling, feeling a mix of both warmth and cold.

It hurt, oh it hurt so badly.

Man, the boys - especially Jinyoung - wouldn’t have let me perform in this condition.

Even yesterday Jinyoung had tried to convince me to cancel my schedule for today. But that would’ve been impossible and I didn’t want to worry fans with the sudden news that I couldn’t attend. I’d rather suffer for a few hours and avoid that.

In the car I managed to send the fans smiles and wave.

“Get some rest, Jia Er,” my driver said. We were friendly with each other since I often talked with him when we were alone in the car. My manager nodded.

“You don’t look so good. You’re pale.” My manager gave me a look full of worry.

I shook my head. “I’m fine, it’s okay.”

He sighed. “Your friends are right. You are so stubborn.”

I leaned back and closed my eyes. The pain was almost unbearable.

My phone rang and disturbed what could’ve turned to a peaceful sleep.

Jinyoung. Of course it was him.

Seeing me tearing up yesterday must have made him worry.

“Sseunie, are you okay?” was the first thing he said when I picked up the call.

I smiled at the nickname. “Hello to you too,” I said laughing.

“How’s your back? Did you worsen it? How about your head, did you take any painkillers?” Man, he was really worried. I hated it.

“Stop nagging. I thought you called because you missed me,” I joked.

“It’s not funny.”

There was something about his voice, sharp and scolding.

“Sorry,” I retreated.

I heard his sigh on the other end.

“You’re worrying Mark too. He hasn’t been able to sleep for the past couple of days.”

I couldn’t help but feel my chest ache a bit at his words.

“Tell him I’m fine. Don’t let him overthink,” I answered. My manager tried sending me signals that we were at the airport.

“I’m okay, Jinyoung. I will be, I promise. Okay?” I tried again.

Another sigh. “Don’t be stubborn, take your medicine and rest. You have tomorrow off, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Use it to take a rest. Don’t do anything, don’t work on your music. Okay?”

“Don’t worry about me, Jinyoung. I’m gonna hang up, I’ll see you in a few hours.”

He told me to take care before he cut the connection.

The airport was crowded as usual. The screams went right in my brain and worsened the head ache. But the fans were cheerful as always. I gave a few smiles. They lifted my mood when I was feeling down. For that I would forever be grateful.

I closed my eyes as soon as I sat in the airplane, knowing full well I wouldn’t get any sleep before I got home.

But my phone decided to disturb me again.

The screendisplay was clearly showing a name. MARK.

Not knowing what to expect of his text, I opened it up. ’You’re ok, right?’

Three words. Those three words felt so heartbreaking but at the same time soothing. I wanted to smile and burst in tears. But I had hurt him. Man, I had broken his heart.

Yet he… he sent me his worry packed in a text message, his hidden love.

“That idiot,” I whispered to myself.

Covering my face in my hands, I sighed, on the verge of crying.

“I really don’t deserve him."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me if you all want me to continue this story :P


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